Writing Again

SO today I had one of my usual awakenings where I simply play on Facebook till I fully decided I should be out of bed.  What I spotted on FB today caught my eye.  A link from one of my fan pages to  a writing contest.  What's so special about that?  Well I've been in a creative slump, and I thought it might be fun to explore the concept.  So I got up, checked out more details on the laptop and began writing.  The contest has  a 2,500 word cap so I'm working with that.  It's finished for step one which is the rough draft.

It's time for a cooing off period and then I'll edit later. It's really nice to be fun an excited about a project.  For a brief time I was so caught up in the story I forgot about any woes and hardships I'm under. I really want to see if I could make of this story/concept.  It needs a lot of work but I still have time.    

Life in the Post-Nasal Drip Lane

All the darn time I have to deal with a condition called post-nasal drip.  It has a host of nasty side effects.  one of them is that sensation of choking and triggering my gag reflex all the time.  Needless to say that dry heaving convulsion is never a good feeling.  Imagine having to do that three times within a 20 minute span.  Also it does produce a lot of mucus, which in itself is gross.  Mucus that builds up behind the throat will produce a offensive odor as well.  Yes this is gross, but its things people live with.  This is on top of my allergies annoy the hell outta me.

In the past I consulted my doctor and my dentist about what's going on.  The dentist informed me if I'm brushing, scrubbing the tongue, and using mouthwash, then its possible post nasal drip.  The doctor gave me some meds that worked to an extent.

This condition can be regulated with medicines. Congestion meds do work well to thin out the mucus and clear out the nasal passages.  For instance, Mucinex D can help a whole lot. It's needed cause on top of gaging, choking and offending people can get pretty discouraging.

On top of this biological drama I decided to do an experiment.  One of them was watching my coffee intake.  Why you ask, because I used to drink venti lattes and frappes from Starbucks daily.  never mind the cost. I was a full on committed drinker.  Furthermore,  I drank coffee at home. A large cup of it to start off my day, and it was good.

When I was fired from SCAD I decided that I didn't need to go to Starbucks.  I noticed that my post-nasal dripping was calming down.  I was like where did the congestion go?  Mind you, Starbucks is not causing the PND.  I just have an aversion to the coffee-based drinks.  This weekend I decided to stop drinking regular coffee at home.  I wanted to see if I could do it, which I could.  Next I wanted to observe any upsets I would have after trying coffee today.

Without the coffee, it seemed that the the PND was not flaring and trying to make me hate life.
After my cup of coffee I started coughing, hacking, gaging and having excess mucus. All of the symptoms of post-nasal drip came back to me with a vengeance.  Let me tell you, I could not get to the Mucinex fast enough. It was horrible.  Sadly this means coffee is off the list of hot drinks.  Hello tea, please don't beat the crap outta my kidneys.  

The Comfort Zone

For those not in the know I originally named the blog after the song by Vanessa Williams.  Later down the line I knew that would change, but at the time blogs were a new thing and I was looking for a good name.  BTW that's the song that was playing while I typed this entry.  I love nostalgia.

This is about trying to get some writing done and feeling often that it can't be done.  Wrote out two pages of script today and I know I can do more.  I need to at least grab my outline (what did I do with it) and follow the plan I laid out for the story.  Now I see the need for an outline. I need to get at least a few more pages done and I will feel like I wrote today.

Contemplating tomorrow's dinner.  It will either be gumbo or field peas.  These two are at extremes, but at the same time I haven't visited the grocery store yet, so I better think about it and get a list done so I can grab all I need and leave.  I really need to stick to the list and make sure I get what I need for the week as opposed to going back multiple times.

breakfast for the upcoming week must be decided as well.  I really want some French toast and sausage and some real maple syrup.  Not every day so I will have to think of an alternative.

Lazy Morning

Trying to get out of bed. Typically I'm wide awake.  Got up early, then went back to bed.  I needed the sleep. It was so worth the extra sleep.  My mind is a little random which means I am just waking up.  Thought about what's for dinner today, and I am not cooking or least I dunno if I'm cooking. I don't want to go to the grocery store without mulling what I want over.  Today may be take out Friday.

Un-Make A Mess?

My place is a mess and I have yet to clean it.  I do have time today to do so, but I've put one foot into the loafing zone, which I should know better than to do, but I did. Well I need to make some breakfast so I may do some scrambled eggs and sausage.  Really don't feel like putting the effort up.  Did make some coffee which I'm sipping on now.  Hopefully I will break free of my meh-ness and work these rooms like a pro and get my food cooked and eaten.

No need to make anything for dinner.  It's really a left over night.  Must keep up with drinking more water than other types of drinks. I say this as I notice I do consume a lot of sugar-based drinks, juices and sodas.  I want to balance my system out more than I have been, so that requires me to express due diligence so hooray to water and it's wonderous properties. I'm also writing to get my writing motor running, and we know five sentences is my minimum.

Best wishes to all.  

Note Cards

Was looking for a way to manage and rearrange my written thoughts for stories/ideas.  I was thinking of getting several note cards and using them for this purpose.  Seems simple, right?  Well of course it is.  It's like note taking for classes and having some resources togo back to other than a notebook, which is still great, BTW. I love having all of my ideas located in one area.

I do need to find a way top break down scenes a lot better and a way to transpose some ideas without having to rip my notebooks to shreds.  Of course I need to find a way to keep the note cards organized for my own sake.  So maybe later in the day I will have something to report in regards to progress.

Wellness?

Spent most of this week trying to get some of my affairs in order.  The week shaped up to be a big ball of meh at first, however I decided that this was not 100% of my life.  I need to set more obtainable daily goals so that I may get some things done.

First and foremost I remembered to take my vitamins today while having breakfast. Need to do this on a daily basis to maintain wellness.  Gonna go write some more things I feel are worthwhile, and ponder how to stretch a dollar or two.  

Justice League Universe: Part One

Justice League Universe: Part One

What Am I Gonna Do With My Life?

Now that I am unemployed and looking for new prospects, I've hit a crossroads.  I sincerely needed the rest. I felt a great weight was lifted from my shoulders.  I'm more than happy to start a new chapter in my life. Yes I am praying to high heaven that I find a new job soon.

Today, after getting my haircut, I wondered aloud, "what do I want to do with myself?" It's a great question, because I need to jump on my plans like now.  There's no looking back or being bitter because quite frankly it doesn't do me any good.  I need to move forward to make sure my blessings aren't blocked by something I can't control.  

I need to contemplate more, but I also wish to make sure that I complete something that's dear to me.  Will be back with an update worthy of my time and efforts.   

My beard looks a bit scruffy and hair on my head needs a trim.

Not so Meh as I Thought

Today I got out of the house and spent some time editing a beat outline for a screenplay. Afterwards came home and relax.  I'm more than happy to get out of the house and be productive. I do feel a little down as I am used to a certain routine that will no longer happen. I suppose I need to keep myself busy some more.  Let's see.  I need to go write something, like I'm doing now. I realize that I have to make myself be productive and strong. This is my life and I will not suffer because my fate is in my hands.

I Feel Like Chicken Tonight

Tonight was me being simple.  I didn't feel like cooking something too complicated so I made some baked chicken.  This recipe was almost too easy.  First I bought four chicken thighs washed  and seasoned (black pepper, cayenne pepper, cajun seasoning, salt, and Italian seasonings).  Baked in a 350 degree oven for an hour or until tender.  So it's a spicy piece of chicken.  I don't mind the heat cause it was controlled.

I made some broccoli and cheese, then some instant vegetable rice.  It was exceptionally good.  I'm full. So this is my no muss, no fuss meal.

Very, very tired. Gonna take a nap soon.

Very breezy outside.

What Shall I Do, What Will I Say?

I'm looking to put down some ideas and I got nervous.  What shall I do?  What shall I say? Sometimes creativity can overwhelm me.  Clearly I'm on the right track to contemplate my next steps.  Well if I need  to write a few more posts to get the gears rolling, then I shall.  Must be on the right track if I'm gonna be all to pieces.  LOL

Perhaps I need some hot tea (black, spice) to make me feel a little more in the mood.  Perhaps something to eat too.  A slice of pizza, and some background sounds.  Every little bit helps, right?  So I dunno what I'm gonna write down, but I'm gonna get it down.

Less Than Meets The Eye?

Less Than Meets The Eye?

A link form Tastes Like Comics.

The Right Frame of Mind

As I think about getting my projects together today, I know one thing is very, very certain.  I must get a new post together.  For those in the know, this is the warm-up to writing.  I spend most of the day chilling.  I washed dishes made popcorn, and I want to watch a movie or two, which is always good for me.  Also gonna get my notepad and jot down several ideas I have for projects.  Need to rewrite a beat outline, which I have additional notes for.

I have got to get shit together.  There's no doubt my success lies within what I'm putting forward.  If this means doubling my efforts than I will do so.  And somehow I thought this post would not have any Star Wars references.

Lots more upsets and now a lovely headache.

Oh Yuck, or How Plans Go Astray

Today was simple, errands, cook a meal, then get to writing.  Well, I got home and discovered the toilet and tub was backing up.  That's all you need to know about that.  Needless to say, I turned my back to call the apt manager, and went back into the bathroom and the toilet overflowed.

Maintenance came by and a plumber was called.  Apparently someone put baby wipes down their commode and clogged the system, causing my toilet and tub to back up.  Was disgusted as this seem to take forever to resolve.  Tried to mop up, and put a towel down to soak up the water as well.  It was a mess.  While waiting for the plumbers it overflowed again.

Because the overflow could affect the entire house, I couldn't even clean the kitchen for fear the dishes would get that nasty water coating them.  I dunno if buring dishes is allowed but I dunno if I'd want my china after they've been emerged in such filth. I was so frustrated I really was ready to give out.

I was so upset I didn't eat a meal until 7:00 PM.  yeah it sounds stupid, but it took nearly all day to resolve this nasty ass caper.  I still have to properly was the floor mats cause I can't put them back on the floor like that.  Also my poor sweet towel deserved better.  

I cleaned the bathroom and will re-clean it again. Can't get back into the tub until I feel it's cleansed.  Yes that sounds OCD, but I don't care.  Nasty ass shit was literally in my tub.

I found myself playing Dragon Age II until I was bored of it and began blogging this post.

The Warm Ups

I promised myself at least an hour a day to write, and that means mapping out time to work on my various writing projects.  Naturally this means looking at my blog, and putting down a post today.

Woke up early because my body didn't want to sleep and I went to bed early.  I was tired.  Couldn't help it.  Once I laid on that bed it was over.  I haven't been at Starbucks for the lattes and frappichinos like I used to do on the regular.  I didn't even make coffee yesterday.

Now that I'm up and  about, and ran errands, I seem to be sleepy again.  Technically I allow myself until 12:00 PM to loaf about.  We shall see what I get done.

Self

Been looking for better ways to spend my time and thoughts, and I need to get to business.  before my next birthday arrives I need to lock down some writing and finances like a champ.  Ain't nothing bad  that i can't fix, but I need to make sure I'm doing the right thing for myself.  Self-evaluations are tough, but I never knew anything I wanted to be easy.

Should write more blog posts. Its a new month.

Happy Labor Day!

The Strained - Is Guillermo del Toro a One-Trick Pony?

The Strained - Is Guillermo del Toro a One-Trick Pony?

Cool Emmet wrote this. Awesome.

Yeah, I Write This Blog!: My Thursday With Maury

Yeah, I Write This Blog!: My Thursday With Maury: Last week I found out that my brake lights were completely out. A driver was kind enough to pull up to me and let me know. I was embarrasse...

My Thursday With Maury

Last week I found out that my brake lights were completely out. A driver was kind enough to pull up to me and let me know.  I was embarrassed.  They were BOTH out.  Driving like that can be a nightmare.  I needed this handled ASAP!

For my piece of mind, the remedy meant a visit to Pep Boys and having to wait while they service my ride.  I got up early so I could beat the crowd and get done quicker. I always think I'm being smart when in fact, the universe had other plans. The break room at Pep Boys was incredibly minimalistic, complete with some plastic chairs and a TV on none other than the Maury Povich show.  For those who have never seen it, count yourself blessed by the grace of the Lord.  I was more than positive I didn't need to see another DNA test show ever in my life.  The guests were ridiculous, loud, and ignorant.    

I found myself, in spite of my headphones hearing all that garbage that goes onto the show.  I was not happy.  Another hour passed and there was this reality show on.  Didn't give a damn what it was about.  All I know is that people were cussing and yelling at each other.  It was annoying and I kept my headphones going.  At this point the chairs was hurting my ass, and I really needed to be done.  Finally Judge Joe Brown was on, and I needed to get outta there.

OMG it took forever for them to ring me up.  I didn't even care.  I knew I was gonna have some time management crunches to get some food, and get ready for work. Any day that I start with Maury really is a hurtful day. Guess what?  I endured.  It was a crappy, crappy set of time waiting for my ride to be repaired. I LOATHED the moments that came along.  I made it through. 

I have to be honest.  Having to sit through Maury and the waiting turned me off 100%.  

Raise the Steaks

Decided that I should make dinner this weekend so I don't have to cook this week.  Pretty clever if I do say so myself, and I do.

Made a simple marinade for the steaks of olive oil, vinegar, white wine, Italian seasonings, Cayenne pepper, and garlic.  I let this one sit overnight.  I'd like the favors to penetrate the rib eyes.  Even though I call this one simple, the pre-made marinades tend to be sugar based, and when fried they tend to caramelize/burn in the frying pan which is both a mess to cook with and clean.  The olive oil is less of an issue for me.  Going to saute some  onions and mushrooms with this.  Will serve some cheddar broccoli on the side. 

The second meal is spaghetti.  This one's not too complex. It's a meat-based sauce so I use ground chuck, Italian sausage (hot).  I seasoned the ground chuck with salt and pepper.  I also sweated some onions and mushrooms along with some garlic. Added the meat, then the marinara sauce.  Added a little sugar to cut the acidic taste, and a splash of white whine.  SIDE NOTE: NEVER overuse wine in your sauces, trust me.  Seasoned with Italian seasonings, oregano,  pepper, salt, garlic and Bay leaves (2).  This is gong to be tonight's dinner so I can make the pasta tonight.  

With the spaghetti I have some mixed salad greens that I'm sure to enjoy.   

Today

I wanted to sleep late today.  It just so happens that I needed the rest.  My vehicle however had other plans for me.  My brake lights went out.  At first I thought I could replace the bulbs, however I found out that it may be a wiring issue.  That is never too good.  I dunno how much this will cost me. 

I do know that I can’t drive without the brake lights, so now I feel a bit trapped.  My poor ride.  I love this car and I want it to last, however it’s slowly falling apart.  I need for it to grow with me not against me.  It’s like a really bad teen right now. 

Very early and most tired but biz needs to be taken care of.

This Is Today

My days have been spent trying to get other things done.  By other I simply mean that my time has been dominated by unwanted things to do.  My mood has changed of late.  Been feeling a bit down, and I stopped writing, however I've got my spirits lifted.  It's a mix of prayer and hope for better days.

Been taking five minute walks.  This got me up and about. Definitely it gave me a moments not to relax my mind.  I feel that's a real positive gift I could give myself.

Summer is an odd time with a mix of heat and quiet.  Staying indoors is definitely worth every bit of this ridiculous bill I got to pay.  Gonna have to tighten my budget down to the minimum.  I think my spending has spun out of control and that's a SHAME.

Woke up late. Didn't set alarm. No place to be. Bed feels so good.

A Simple Pleasure

It's not too hot outside, and after seeing on CNN how too many people are couch potatoes, I decided I was gonna do a simple five minute walk.  I needed to go to check my mailbox just the same, so it was fun to walk around.  It made me feel good.  It s a simple thing in life, but it was so worth it for a moment to clear my head.

Now if you will excuse me I need to turn my TV off this damned soap opera cause I'm not feeling it.    

The Funk is Upon Me

Been in a writing funk for some time now, and this has lead me to spiral down in terms of quality and quantity.  In effort to combat this infrequency (stress) I feel I should at least write a few things now.  After all, I give Twitter and FB some love.  Why not here?  

The week has been odd as I don't feel sleepy, yet I don't feel like I want to be up.   Like I need more rest.  I know that's not the case since I did get a good bit of sleep last night.  I feel like I just need to clear my head, watch a movie or two, and enjoy my free time.  

Eventually I'll have a desire to write once more.  I feel like a fool.  I have got to empower myself.   Do what i need to do to get things done that I desire.  

8-6-11

From Yesterday:

It's been a lull point this month as my writing output fizzled. I want to blame it on my crappy year, but it implies my entire years was terrible, and it never was that way.  Spent some time enjoying peace and quiet to settle my mind.  I hoped I would be inspired creatively by the still time.  It meant picking up my pen and paper and writing out my thoughts.  That's how I got the ball rolling.

Today started out hot (or "hawt").  opened my door and felt a wave of hear rush me. There was no need to go anywhere after that experience. Soon, in the distances I heard the crackle of thunder and lightning.  Soon it got closer, with rain and wind following.  It was quite the storm.  The power flickered off and on several times until it ultimately went off.  I heard several sirens, no doubt on the main road.

Had to eat something.  Leftover greens filled my tummy the moment the lights came back on.  Looked around the house when the power was off.  All I had was banana chips and cookies.  I should have made a meal sooner for myself.  Also next store trip will be about me getting more snacks in the house.

Comcast services are out again. Time for a movie via DVD: Sleepy Hollow.

Comcast services are out again. Time for a movie via DVD: Sleepy Hollow.

Thunderstorm with high winds. Power off/on. Lotsa lightning. Sitting in LR writing.

Stacy's Diet

At times a brother needs to access his eating habits.  I say this because for months I consumed Venti lattes and frappichinos (with whip).  So am I comfort drinking?  This has been too much.  So I decided I can do something real simple: For this week (started on Monday) I gave up lattes and frapps to see what happens.

Does this mean I can't have coffee?  Nope.  This is made at home.  So the effects, I haven't been cranky no withdrawal headaches and today I turned into a writing fool.  I may allow myself a latte on friday.  Tall.  maybe.  I make no promises.

Its late and it feels good to lay on my bed and chill.

The Southern Cooking Throwdown

I promised myself at the start of last week that I would make a southern meal.  I knew what I wanted too: Collards, ribs and mac & cheese.  Of course this is one of those things you can try and cook in a day, and you will be too sorely exhausted to eat.

This means the meal will take me three days and and shall be Sunday's dinner.  First and foremost, I started with the greens.  I was forewarned the pre-cut greens needed to be washed and the rough stems removed.  I did not know how many stems I found, but it felt endless.  I got them out.  This pot needed meats too.  So I used three: thick cut bacon, ham steaks and country spareribs.  It took some doing, but I got it all cooked last night.  it resides in my fridge as I get the ribs done.

The ribs were marinated last night after I rubbed light salt, cayenne pepper and Italian seasonings upon them.  Used a Teriyaki marinade as well. Once par boiled I put them in the oven with a BBQ sauce.  Mixed in the sauce some honey and a palmful of cayenne pepper.  I sweet flamer with a spicy kick in the background.

The macaroni and cheese is in the oven now.  Used three cheeses: Mozzarella, Colby and Cheddar.  Eventually its gonna be done and cheesy. Busy day.

Wrong Number

OK, so I'm playing Dragon Age 2 because it's fun, and I get this picture message of someone's meal.  I ask who is it.  The lady replies, "You don't remember me. We had sex last night, and you said it was the 'bomb-digity'" Let me stop this post right here.  If anyone knows me, they know what words I do and don't use. Unless I'm being ironic, I'm not ever gonna describe love-making with those words, ever.   I was positive a friend was pulling a prank.  Told her she had the wrong man.  After that awkward moment we agreed to stop speaking.

All I can say is, damn.

Late Night Cleaning

So OK, there was this thought in my head about trying to clean up which included vacuuming.  Clearly this is a painstaking process and needs to be done over time rather than all in one day.  I started in the morning, then stopped, played video games.  Now I'm back at it this late.  I really wanted to get the carpet cleaned.  I knew I'd only do one side of the room.  It was necessary.  

It made me feel good, and I think I got a lot organizing done.  There's still a long way to go.  Who cares.  I'm on the start of something positive.  Also my ring came back to me.  Sounds weird?  Well it comes and goes as it pleases, but I think its here to stay with me.  Something about it empowers and reminds me that I'm on the right path. Life is good.  

Things I Owe Myself

In the midst of a lot of drama and one hot-ass summer, I've been feeling like I'm not worthy to do anything.  This path of negative thought has got to go.  I don't mind doubt. Doubt tells me to put extra focus on my projects and make them stronger.

I owe myself the chance to get my work done with a positive outlook.  I owe myself to reach my goals and break free of all forces that constrain me.  There's no reason for me to be wrapped up in the negative.  I'm better than that.

So I owe myself a clarification of my goals and the opportunity I'm blessed with to go for them.  Don't really need to do the self-pity thing.

Loafing

I'm not doing much.  Don't ask me shit.  I'm not doing it.  LOL  Yes I'm being mischievous, but a brother feels he needs to chill and be happy.

The bug buzzed my ears.  I hate that zzzz sound near my ears.  Swatted and missed it.  Do I have to get out the Off and keep it away by what bugs refer to as a "restraining order?" I just may.

Got up too early.  That sucked. Up now, I have to deal with it.

Breezy

It's relatively a slower pace than usual.  I get a lot of things done that normally I can't get to within a short period of time.  Been having a creative spurt that I'm enjoying.  It's sort of a simplistic streak as it's not about overwriting, but jotting down notes. While on break I'm not as caught up in creativity, but I promised myself a blog post today and I feel now's that time.

Marinating some steaks that should be good for cooking when I get home.  I didn't buy the veggies like I was supposed to.  So I have to stop by the store and pick some up.  I like a few sauteed onions, mushrooms and bell peppers with my steak.  May not do any shopping and use what's in the fridge.  I'm sure I have one onion in the fridge and make a salad to go alongside the steak.

Sounds like a good plan to me.

Being sick is no reason not to write, even if its a texted blog post. Drinking ginger ale to settle my stomach. Watching a crime documentary.

The Nitty-Gritty Tangled Web

The Nitty-Gritty Tangled Web

A Brother wrote this post for Tastes Like Comics.

Banking on Things

Here's a lesson for all would-be people who use banks.  I spent $15.00 on gas when I had about $24.00 in my bank account.  I never forgot this.  Checked my account to make sure the money was out, proper.  I kept seeing no withdrawals for a couple of days.  Not even a "pending holds" notice.  Mind you, I KNEW I spent that money.  Left the account alone.

In my younger days I would have assumed the money was already transacted and spent what I saw.  Well if I had done that the overdraft fee would now be a part of my account and I would have to pay that on top of the expenses I did want, say like a hamburger.

So  my lesson is do your own accounting because not all banks are quick to alert you to the fact that you may overdraw your account, in fact it appears to benefit them to make it look like your account is full when its now.  In my opinion, when you reach a small percentage of money those "pending holds" notices somehow don't make it as quick to your account as when you have more money in them.  

I Didn't Want To Get Up, But . . .

It's true.  I wanted to sleep till 1:00 PM today, or that's what I told myself.  That in was in no way correct. So my little fantasy came undone.  Decided I should write a blog post to get the brain working.  It's a mostly quiet morning, but there is some construction/repairs going on which kinda also takes the fun outta sleeping. I could turn the TV on and fall asleep.

On a side note the cable went out yesterday and I tried to contact Comcast, who said their services affected the entire area.  Fortunately I have DVDs to keep some entertainment going on.  Needless to say Comcast did not spoil the day.

New Day

Did not want to get up today.  Found myself awakened by a phone call.  It was a sign to get up, since I hadn't fallen back asleep.  Might as well get up and write a blog post.

Been trying to drink a lot more water in my days.  I usually don't get enough, and drink sodas and coffee.  I wanted to rebalance myself.  So this has been week three and I have my coffee (smaller cup) but I will also drink at least 1 1/2 liters a day.

Need to step up my thesis game.  I feel I should be much more productive, therefor I shall be more.  been reading some new books, so I have a lot to do.  It's all good.

7/2/11

NOTE: This was written on 7/2/11.  Like a goof I forgot to post it.

Unlike most people I will not have an extended weekend with the holidays, however that will not spoil my fun.  I play to relax a lot more and enjoy my day.  Even managed to plan out a pasta dish for Monday since I lack a grill.  I can deal with that.

Speaking of food, I managed to get under budget with the shopping today.  I saved $30.00, which will likely go directly to gas.  There's only one expense I want this week, so its time to trim the fat.  Bills must be paid and the whole

Decisions, Decisions.

Trying to make this day a productive one. I'm writing for thesis, SDCS, and TLC.  I've run into a wall where I felt my strength was going down. I can't have that.  It makes me feel like I'm not participating in my own success.  It's time to take on the things that I need to get done without fear.  That means making tougher decisions.

Papa Doesn't Preach

For those not in the know, I've been having a devil of a time communicating with a family member.  It's gotten to the point that after leaving phone messages and waiting for a response (it's been two months) has not done me any good.

I'm typically a "bounce back" type of guy with these things, however it really bugged me to not speak. Well one can make the best of a bad situation, right? Maybe no return calls is a good thing.  Maybe said person really isn't worth my time.

Before I wrote this relationship off I thought it to be best to try and call again. Why did I bother? I got the same response as the last time--nothing.  After several  moments of reflection later, and it came to me: why did I put myself through this?  I feel like a fool for having hope. In truth things would never change. Why should they?  

Weird. Walking away from this is nowhere as bad as I expected it to feel like.  I simply cannot waste time past this post.  Did it change me?  Yes it did.  Am I all rage now?  No, but its time for some tough choices and no looking back.  

Late night mellowing out. Not sleepy yet. Such is life. Played video games when I should have been writing. I'm hopeless.

My Life with a Power Nap

Yes I took a power nap today and it feels good.  if I didn't know better I'd take another one, but then I'd never go to sleep later tonight.  Such is life.  It's been a time adjusting week with my schedule going thorough major changes.  It takes the body some days to get used to things.  My game is off.

The greatest woe to my week was when I was driving home and the service/engine and brake lights flashed.  I panicked, but I got home OK.  Decided to make sure to have the brake fluid flushed and the oil changed the very next day.  let me tell you I loathe that feeling on the road when I feel like my car could give out.  I was on the parkway for goodness sakes.  Can't have a hot mess then.

I should write more, but I'm tired.  I got up early today to get a haircut.  Yes, to get a good seat I got up early so I wouldn't have to wait.  I was second!  Ha.  My earliness paid off big time.  My power nap paid off big time.  Thank God my car didn't cost more than it did for maintenance.  Power nap settled me down.

For dinner:  Fully loaded baked potato.  Awww yeah!  LOL

Man I'm tired but I need a haircut, so I'm up and about for it. It payed off second for my cut.

I so need coffee and the line at SB is long! Dang It.

Untitled

One day I shall learn not to wait until I'm outta clothes to do laundry.  It's too much of a hassle and rather a two day affair.  I stocked up on quarters, but its too expensive to do all of this.  It's time-consuming, yet necessary.  Would it have been so bad to take last week to, say wash all the polo shirts?  I should have doled this out proper.

No need to cry about it now.  I will either take the lesson in hand, or disregard it.  Expect a post sometime soon about how I didn't heed my own advice.  The worst part is the dryer.  Brrrr.  The cost and time is staggering.

That being said, after that its lotsa film-watching time to where I am taking notes to review the material. This shall be coupled with me finding the time to soak these Ribeye steaks in wine, and bake some taters. Somewhere else in this day I will take a few moments to actually write down either some notes or paragraphs for scripts and stories I'd like to complete.  I say a simple paragraph or two in the notebook should be very sufficient.  

Also I've had this kind of desire to want to put together a couple of comic book stories, however, I need to get those stories together.  It's just a pipe dream at the moment.

The Warm Up

It’s about that time I get myself in high gear and get my writing projects managed.  It means I have a lot of work to do, and the first start to this is my blog writing.  Life’s been a roller coaster of events and who knows where and when the stability will full be at or the full stop.  In my opinion, its better to make the best of what I have in front of me, because no one’s gonna pull for me if I don’t wholeheartedly.  

Denied myself a latte today due to the cost.  I was just gonna have to find another way to stay buzzed.  Yes my body missed the rush today.  My poor substitute was some OK sweet tea and a brownie.  No, it doesn’t come close, but at the same time, I am more than an iced venti latte.  

As my Mom and a friend suggested, “Stacy break out your “to do list” so you can break your projects down like a master.  Good advice.  

Its not too early to ask myself what’s for dinner this weekend.  It has to be something good.

Walks While Sipping Lattes

A while back, A Brother walks and sips his latte with peace and satisfaction.  His power comes from the fact the he knows that the world will be ok. . .  for at least the moment.  While walking I spotted a most curious situation-A couple holding hands strolling leisurely down the street.  Typically it's a dime a dozen situation on the streets, but this couple drew dirty looks/glances, and one person nearly walked into the street to avoid these guys.

No big deal, you say?  Welcome to the south where you ARE judged by appearances. I gave that couple kudos 'cause they knew they were going to be judged and walked down the street just the same.  Also I'm not hating on nobody for being in love. I kept this scene in my head so you know one day it will be a story I write.  

Sometimes I wish all it took was giving someone a latte to calm them down, but ironically lattes will boost you up.  Perhaps some herbal tea instead?

Bust That Thing

For those not in the know, I am an artist.  I'm skilled in drawing, painting, photography, printing, and writing.  I'll need to dust off my drawing skills because I feel they are a part of me with equal standing to my writing.  This can't come soon, although I wanted to work on my skills during the weekends. Thesis Fridays rules my weekends as does screenwriting.  This does not mean I won't get back to the basics someday.  My goals must have order.

The second part of this post is about what kind of artist am I? been thinking of how to get outside the box.  Ever notice how some marginal talent percolates while some legit talents simply simmer in the eye of public.  I sometimes wonder what it would be like if someone suddenly became a little pretentious, audacious, and a little naughty then busted the stuff outta the box.  Just wondering.  Creativity should be fun, otherwise it's boring.

Ha!

Ok y'all know a brother does his Starbucks run all the time.  Spend more money there than I care to admit.  Part of it is the walk to Starbucks as I get to move about.  Feels good.  Anywhoo went there the other day and this chick was checking me out.  I caught her, and she tried to pretend she wasn't. She couldn't be any more obvious.  Her eyes couldn't lie, and she didn't hide well.  I'm like if you're not interested, that's cool with me, but for God's sake don't think you're unnoticed.

The Lazy Post

Not chillaxing as I normally do.  Been having some odd sleep issues.  Wake up early, fall back asleep.  Get up late.  Let's hope this passes because that's it.  Perhaps cutting back on the (gasp) lattes will be another step.  Too bad I can't Jedi Mind Trick myself to sleep.

Get Organized

Spent last night off the net with the exception of a few peaks on the Blackberry.  I needed to relax a little.  In spite of charging the laptop, I never turned it on to type.  I did jot down a page full of notes for the thesis, which I am glad I did.  I felt even a small amount of effort on my part was worth the time to complete.  Now I have to make sure I organize myself because I wish to do a lot of writing that needs to get done.  So below is a list of things that will be worked on this week.

• Blog Posts (6)
• Thesis
• Screenplay 
• Idea Development

For those not in the know I write here, for Several Deadly CINES, and Tastes Like Comics.  I sincerely want to add a few more cinema posts to CINES.  I will settle for no less than two written for this week.  I may get to post them on the weekend, but I feel that writing them will work for me.  I've been updating thesis info of late.  The blog feels naked without some fresh essays.  I have the perfect films I want to look at and discuss.

I also have a collaboration to complete, which I'm excited about.  That's tomorrow's priority.  I need to get cracking.   Thesis needs a lot more research, but that's part of the charm of thesis.  You work those suckers with some intensity.  The screenplay needs some plot adjustments.  I have to thank my buddy Thor for that.  Check out his site, Caffeine-Fueled and forums as well.  The film and game reviews are hilarious as well as good. I have fun visiting.    

Saturdazed But Not Confused

Watching the Nolan Batman films while working on my thesis.  I have a few articles to read so I can use them as scholarly sources. Sometimes this becomes a labor, but I like trying to understand the genre of comedy and a few of its sub-genres. Managed to get a new Tastes Like Comics article written.  I'll have to post on that a little later, since its not up yet.

Dealing Meals

I dunno if I can get this all done, but I have several meals planned to be made this weekend.  Now I won't be eating them all in one day, however I seek to have several dinner for the upcoming week, and spend less on dining out.

The meals should be simple to prepare.  I have several of the ingredients already and started the prepwork.  First off the three meals are, fettucini with  Alfredo sauce and vegetables.  I will explain the jazzed up sauce a little later.  Next is steaks and mixed veggies. Last is Collard greens and BBQ chicken.

I marinated the meats tonight.  The steaks in teriyaki honey, Montreal seasonings and fresh garlic.  The chicken soaks in wine and with fresh garlic, season salt, garlic powder and cajun seasonings.

I didn't get the collards today since the store was out.  I may need to pick up some more fresh garlic and sun dried tomatoes.

To Do Lists

The time has come for me to get more of my act together, and I know that takes more than saying I'm doing what I set out to do.  A brother needs to get organized.  I'm rather scatterbrained (typical artist behavior).  So now's the time to try out making tangible to do lists.

The goal is not to do everything in one day, but rather looking at what I want to do, and not getting overwhelmed with the process.  For example, I'm working on my thesis, but if I focus on getting a certain topic within the thesis covered, I can get that done, then work on the next.  

Also this should help with my fiction and blog posts.   I need to have a list of topics and worth them into my daily schedule.  The main thing is I'm not expecting perfection with this, but rather structure and results.  Even if something doesn't get accomplished, i can map my expectations and eventually fine tune what I'm doing.

The Smells From the Kitchen: Savory Goodness

Before I get into what smells so good, know that I earned this Klondike bar I'm about to scarf down. After a friend suggested making steak in the oven and my own love of steaks, I decided that I would make today's steaks in the oven.  This took a little prep work, but not too much.  It was really simple.

I started with seasoning the meat, then a honey Teriyaki marinade.  I added some fresh garlic to this and let it sit for a few hours.  When it was ready for cooking, I set the oven for 350.  In a baking dish (lightly coated in olive oil), I laid out the steaks. I cut a whole onion, two bell peppers, fresh garlic, and some mushrooms (drizzled in olive oil) to lay on top of the steaks.  They're in the oven now making my house smell so good.  

So this was for sure worth a try, as when I used the marinades on the stove, it tends to stick to the pan  They caramelize and burn too quickly.  The steaks taste good, but the pan is pure heck to clean.

Bad marinade adventures aside, I'm eating this Klondike bar and loving my Saturday.  It's the little things that make this day so good.  For sides I'm making some broccoli with cheddar.

Thursday Wrap-Up

Hello all. It's been an up and down week as classes started and the place is like a retail store in terms of business.  I really haven't devoted the time I need to writing properly.  That burns me up.  I promised myself an entry here, and now I'm gonna have one. 

Been looking over my ideas for my thesis and thought about changing it.  If I talk more about this, it has to be on SDCS.  Y'all know the drill.

Got a haircut on Tuesday and that in itself was a process.  Made myself get up early so I can get the cut, go back home, and take a nap, if need be.  Instead  I arrived to a CLOSED barbershop.  I went back home, took a nap and realized after I dozed off I should call the place to see if it opened.  I called, my barber wasn't there, BUT I needed a cut so I went.

While there I watched a documentary against Planned Parenthood and targeting Black viewers.  It was very politically-charged.  A brother hates having to deal with race issues before he gets his cut.  Some of it was made to incense me too (it worked BTW).  A brother did leave the shop irritated with what he saw and having an ok haircut.  Didn't fell 100% sexy (more like 90%).  It was bittersweet.  

Mondays Should Not Be Meh

Been sorting out a lot of things this week.  One is the appearance of my bedroom.  That floor needs a good vacuuming and I intend on that happening.  First I need to get all my dirty laundry organized.  I need to get this out of the way so I don't look back and get pissed I didn't handle this face one.   Next I'm getting rid of old paper/notes.  It must go.  Some of it will face the shredder.  It needs to get out of my apartment.  I'm looking forward to a dust free and clean bedroom.   

Thesis Day

It's good because my mind is on my thesis, and that meant getting an introduction page done, and getting the pages to follow.  The first few pages are all about defining a B-Film and its history.  My next step is to let the pages cool off.

Got the oil changed today and that was a smooth process.  I'm glad I decided to not wait for the weekend for this one.  Sometimes it's too crowded and uncomfortable on the weekend.  it feels like a nasty chore then.  Better to get up a little early, get it done today and be done.  I do have a few more errands to run but that can't happen today.

Let's see what else I can get done.  I do know I need a meal.   LOL  

Must Love March

It's been a while since my last post.  I'm more than trying to get back into the swing.  The weather's been warming up of late. Now pollen is out there.  Hello my old friend allergies.  I know they are around the corner.  Tomorrow's errands include getting some allergy meds.   I kinda hate that I need the meds, but love that they work.  Been in a bit of a fog.  I blame the weather as I haven't used the allergy meds yet.

Lazy night that is not to my liking. Its Monday, my unfun day. Let's hope Tuesday is my good day.

Wednesday and Roll With It

My attention was held by a two-part Dr. Who repeat.  Got up way too early yesterday, and I just had to see the conclusion today.   Those Weeping Angels are a bit odd are they not?  Still I wanted to see more.  I got my fix.   

Been writing on pen and paper this week, trying to organize my thoughts and actions.  It's time to step up my game.  

Been cleaning my apartment a lot too.  TIme to have this place looking like someone is clutter-free.  As my Brother says, "an uncluttered home is an uncluttered mind."  I love that thought.   I have got to clean off my dining room table soon.  It looks a mess.  

Gotta go.  Eye allergies.   UGH!   

Now That I'm Awake...

Now that I'm awake, I've been editing two cinema posts. It's a lot of work.  I still have to get some images of these films since I'm asking people to take note of some scenes. That will happen tomorrow.  I do think they are good posts and they need a little more info to put in there as well.  Should I add the third today?  

Haven't ate a thing yet so I need to do it quickly, or hold off till tomorrow.  

I Wanna Go Back To Sleep

Didn't want to get up this morning.  I'm still tired.  I really want a late start, but that may not do me any good.  Besides, I'm up now.


Made a mental note last night that the garbage has to get out of my apartment today, so that's next on my agenda.

Fiction writing took a little of a back seat today and last night.  My mind was elsewhere.  I don't like that, but it happens.  Made some strides in my nonfiction writing I'm more than happy to discuss.  
 
Managed to get a page of thesis done last night.  Hand wrote out the corrections, and should strive to make the effort to edit the actual page.  Tomorrow I'd love to have four completed pages done.  It's a better start than before, and I love that I have some of the work to show for the research.  

Gotta get to things done.

Looks Like Rain

Well outside looks gloomy, and I'm being as lazy as I wanna.   Watching Hellboy on DVD.  I love this film.  Then again I have an affinity for Gothic stories.  I do think I found my forth review for this week.   I'll be working on this soon.

Will finish watching The Tudors sometime this weekend.  On season two.  I'm a little disappointed that seasons 3 and 4 are not streaming.  They gave me enough to be addicted to.   The first season was fascinating.  My other weakness is costume dramas, which may lead to my fifth review.

Monday Happenings

Monday's can be tricky.  I tend to want to sleep later in the day.  I wondered about my writing today as I haven't done any.  Never to worry.  Wrote  some film reviews that I need to let marinate for a while before I go back and edit them.  They will be on my cinema blog, Several Deadly CINEs soon.   I hate not keeping up with posting, and I'm down for some new CINEs postings.

I'm also needing to get back up with the thesis.  Somewhere between now and the end of the week I need to do a stronger abstract and introduction.  

Working It Out

Today I'm determined to write something new.  Laundry is in the final stages, the floors are mopped, and I need to clean a little more as I mellow out to some songs.  Well I know I gotta make dinner today.  I have yet to eat breakfast.  I'd like some tea to mellow out with and then look at what's on my writing plate.

Last night I scribbled down some ideas, and woke up with some more ideas.  I how I hate that feeling that all of its there and in the vapors of my mind.  I will work it out.    

Thursdays are Hangovers from Wednesdays

I don't feel like writing much today, which means I insist on posting a few sentences.  Yesterday was full of upsets and twists.  I'll get over that.  I really want a day to rest my mind from the highs lows and downs.   Bouncing back is always difficult, but I know I want to have a better day, so I must.

Going to say a few extra prays because I really need to focus on things that better me as opposed to the things that cannot be changed.  Also, if I can help myself, which I can, I will put my best foot forward today.

On a side note I was not creative today, so I feel slightly guilty about that. It means I will likely create something later today.  Will keep my notepad handy.

The Short Story Part 5: Tips

Before the editing process began I got some good feedback from friends on this short story.  As I stated before, I never gave up on revisions to the text. I learned  more about  writing  since I penned this story, and I believe that I can make a good story better. The ultimate goal is to make the story publishable.

The feedback I received concerned issues with tenses (I mixed past and present), conflict resolution with the characters/narrative, and trimming/adding parts of the story.  All of which is both necessary to address and daunting.  The plot itself does not need to be made over, and will remain intact for the most part.    Still when I have a day to myself, I will commence to properly rewriting.

The Short Story Part 4: Theme

This morning I woke up to thinking about the theme of my short story.  I jotted down some notes this morning before I dozed back off into dreamland.  I'm glad I did.  When I have more time I will jot down more notes.

In regards to theme.  Themes are embodied in the desires of our protagonists, therefore I have several questions I need to ask myself:

• What does my protagonist want?
• What does my protagonist need?
• What stands in the way of the protagonist getting what he wants/needs?
• What happens if he doesn't get what he wants or needs (the stakes)?  

These questions will help me shape the theme, and know the character a little better.  Also every story needs some risks, or stakes.  If they don't have them, we won't care for the characters or outcome.

The Short Story Part 3: Small Victories

Yesterday was a discombobulated mess, however, I did managed to get a few things done-story wise.  Not bad.  Don’t want to take these moments for granted.  They are small victories and I appreciate them.  Now I need to keep my momentum going.   

Another aspect of the story I wish to try and that’s some research.   For this I need to go look up a few things.

Did some free association with some scenes and dialogue.  Wondering if it fits or not.  Willing to take it further to get it into shape.   Not afraid at this moment.   It’s rather rewarding.   Also looking at the genre of the story.  I would classify it as a literary story, but I wonder where does this story fit in with what I want to read.  If there were other literary elements I did like, say, black humor, would I still like it?  

Trying a few new elements with the descriptions.  I hope this pays off, as I rather like what I read.   If need be, I will cut it loose.  Will save it for something else. 

Did go back and observe some tense structures.  I am switching between past and present.   I should try the story in the present.  Keep it that way. 

Wrote out some dialog exchanges between the characters.  Will have to cut it.  It’s too long.  I know this because the characters are essentially talking heads.  I did need to write it out in order to get to the heart of the story.  At least I lost my fear of cutting things.   

The Short Story Part 2: Editing

Let me say thank you to some awesome people who gave me some feedback on this story.   Feedback from others is crucial at some point to allow us to see another angle to any idea or story.   

I did some light editing last night.  I looked for typos and formatting errors.  Also cut out a few pages.  I'm going to duplicate the file ("save as") and revise from there.    This is but a simple step.

This morning I had a few ideas for the intro paragraph, and that meant writing a few paragraphs out and leaving them for a later date.  Also some ideas for a couple of dialogue adjustments and scenes came to mind.  Jotted them down on a separate document to possibly add later.  

When I make another sweep at editing, I will definitely look at the characters' voices.  There are two distinct characters and four who speak in this story.  Each needs to feel like they have a specific voice.  I need to make sure I'm able to give them their due.  

By the way did I mention that writing is rewriting?  If I haven't, now you know.   

The Short Story Part 1

I wrote a short story a while back.  It was after I took all these creative writing classes in my undergrad days so the skill set to complete it was there.   The problem was, of course, was the story needed more fine tuning.   Well that time is now.

This is a post about me revising this short story to be a better story because it deserves enrichment, and demands completion.   This is a step toward completion.

Not Tonight

I know this sounds completely silly, but I don't feel like writing tonight.  I feel like relaxing and vegging out to another movie.  I however feel compelled to write at lest a few sentences for my blog.   This way, at least I did commit to thinking about creative writing.

I will edit a short story I was working on, and I feel I can do better with it.   Yes, I wish I had done more, but I think my mind and body needed some rest today.   I do know that if I have to I will shut the TV off, listen to some music and get things done.  

A few days ago I was ready to put pen to paper, but the timing was wrong.  Was way to busy to commit to what I wanted.   Full of mixed emotions about results and being counter productive.  Hopefully it will resolve itself.  

Tuesdays With Latte

For those not in the know, yesterday I decided to have a latte.  I hadn't had one in a week.  I suppose you can say I was abstaining from them - too much of a good thing. Well, I knew I could have my fave yesterday cause no harm will come from this, right?  I nursed it, sipping on it since I had the whole day.

My stomach started hurting, gurgling and growling.  This thing was mad with me.  I was like, what did I do to you?  Needless to say I had an uncomfortable evening as the latte took its toll on my stomach.  My body didn't want it today, as much as I wanted it.

My tummy's been moody of late, so I better take care of it.   No lattes for the rest of the week.   Iced or hot.

Tuesdays like Mondays

Well it's one of those days that I got up earlier than I expected.  Decided to arrange a few things around the place.  Man I'm thinking I should have slept a little longer, but I was up, and my mind is buzzing.

Working on more blog posts.  I need to make notes and get things done.  I do see a pile of laundry that needs to be handled.   Why in the world did I not buy a hamper?  A little annoyed with myself at this moment.  Oh well I'll have to use a garbage bag and pray I don't mix it up with the regular garbage.  That would be very embarrassing.

Today does feel like a Monday cause I got this "let's start the week off" feeling.  Let's hope this passes because we know its Tuesday.  

Inspired In the Morning

Woke up this morning with an idea for a prose short story.  It dawned on me that this felt like a part of an older story I wrote.  It was like I have an open door here.  I've thought about this story more and more.  Found the original, and I realized how unfinished this story must be.  I have more to add and cut.  I do believe it is worth telling and must commit to it being completed.   If I do not I feel I have not given this story what it needs to be a whole story.  

Now that I have new skills to enhance my writing, I should take full advantage of them now to make what I wrote sing.   Writing can have a metaphysical aspect to it.  I like that it does.

Very cold outside. Even worse is warming up the ride. I don't know how people stand the cold. Its too much for me.

New Black Swan post at SDCS

I realize not everyone reads both of my blogs, but I do post to this and Several Deadly CINEs.  For those not in the know, CINES (or as I call it SDCS) is my Cinema Studies blog.  I created in part to dedicate it to media, while keeping this blog a bit more personal.  

The goal isto update both frequently.   While it won't be planned posts, the updates will be done a lot more frequent.  

So for those a little curious about the Black Swan film, I have the post ready for you to see.

Saturdazed

Feeling a bit blah today, and didn't do much of anything.  Decided that I should write something, be it on the laptop or in my notepad.  Perhaps a little of both today.   I really need to get on the ball with things.   Spend way too much time online goofing off yesterday.  

Tonight is left over spaghetti and salad.   I dunno if I will make anything tomorrow.  May just pull stuff out of the freezer.  

Decided to watch The Two Towers.   It's my background movie today.  

Hello World

Spent the day loafing about.  I knew I had nowhere to go today.  Made sausage and scrambled eggs for breakfast when I got up.   I'm rather indulgent today.   I know I need to write more on my projects, and I failed to get my package in the mail.  I'm a freaking doof sometimes, but I needed to not go anywhere.  I insist on getting three plots done today.

On a side note I hand wrote out a few ideas.   Gotta keep that up or face being too inactive.  

Dreams and Early Start

Woke up early this morning and I remember some kooky dreams.  I'll go write them down cause they felt like they have story potential.  I did make myself go back to bed.  I felt that I should not be so eager to get up and waste precious sleep time.  At first I thought I wasn't going to fall back asleep, but then it happened.

Take that early morning!

I worked on my thesis some more.  It was a paltry display of work effort today, however, I managed to back up my material, so I feel that alone is worth the efforts.  Oh, I need to eat a meal.  I can't live on good thoughts alone.  I may go write and research some more.   I saw a good article on Douglas Sirk I want to read through.   I also have a couple more articles I'd love to read.

The Works Cited page is done, or at least all the info is on one page.  I will need to fine tooth comb this sucker cause I want it to stand out.

Had to run a couple of errands today.  One of them being going to the post office, and I left one of the packages at home.  I am really a hot mess this week.  I think I need to make a list of the things I need done, then work at them.  As it stands I am not organized this week.

The new quarter starts this week.   I really love the rush of new people.  I however know that rush has pros and cons.   Lord help me.    

2011

Insisted on getting a haircut this morning.  I needed one, and that meant getting up early to beat the crowd.   I had three people in front of me.  That means I got up too late, AND like everyone else, I waited until after the holidays to maintain my do.  I look nice now.  Got the beard and mustache trimmed as well.  Now I feel and look sexy.